The leaving by Brian Purcell

‘The Light Will not Enter’ by Brian Purcell

the light will not enter
any crack in my body
although there are many –
numberless each day
nor can it reach
the mind’s dark confusion –
would illuminate nothing
only despair
nothing I ingest
will make any difference
the scales of the fish
are dull in the air
and my hands
become stone
cementing the cracks –
my old beliefs
are today’s uncertainties –
and everything resolved
each tiny victory
is undone tomorrow
when I walk in the cold –
but this is what I wanted
no easy solutions
picket-fence gold
the love of women
with interchangeable faces –
I wanted one love
one passion and truth
and if it burnt out
on a high summer night
this was a truth
that held its own light